Thursday, October 14, 2010

Purple, Smelly, Evil, Vile

Today, for the first time in a long time, I had heartburn.

I object. I am way too young for this. Young people are supposedly to be ridiculously healthy all the time. I'm supposed to feel and look fabulous 24/7 until I turn like thirty or something, right? My body obviously needs to get with the program.

It's been so long, I'd almost forgotten what it felt like. Ack. Almost... too bad I didn't get to totally forget. I could have gone for that.

When my head ache makes the floor look like it's moving, I know this could well be a baby migraine. (Oh. Migraines. I'll take heartburn any day.) So, in haste, I find some pain reliever to nip it at the bud. Fast. When I have heartburn, it can mean one of two things. One, it's going to be a mildly unpleasant day or two, Anna is going to be violently ill. (Thankfully, I think this one was the former.) In the case of heartburn... I must choke down a anti-acid.

I loathe anti-acids. The powdery texture is so thoroughly nauseating. Why would they make a medicine that is supposed to help you with your stomach ache so truly vile? If I can get it down without gagging, we're home free, baby! If not... well... it's not a good thing.

So. I had heartburn. It was mild. There was hope. But I had to act quickly. I meandered to the medicine cabinet. Stalling sort of, kind of totally on purpose. I found the bottle of anti-acids and peered in. They looked so evil. They smelled even worse. I grimaced.

Ewww... do I have too?

Shall we consider the options? A few seconds of agony, or the possiblity of a few days in agony?

Well. When you put it that way...but they are so disgusting.

Shush. Just eat them.


I'm not disagreeing, but it's got to be done.


I selected two. Purple. Smelly. Evil. Vile. I looked at them, lying in wait. Sitting innocently on my palm, waiting to torture my taste buds.

I got a glass of water. If I was going to have to taste them, I was going to have something to wash it down with.

One... two... three...

First bite.

Oh yeah. They are so disgusting.


Ack! Bluck! Ick! Eww! Chew faster! It's getting stuck in my teeth!

Swallow...swallow... YES! Done!!


Obviously, I survived. And I live to fight heartburn and anti-acids another day.

Although I sincerely hope I don't have too.

No comments:

Post a Comment